After Hours
by snowstorm-at-sunset
Summary: James Lucas has been working at Grace Brothers for several years. Lately he has noticed that his feelings toward one of his co-workers has changed. How does he go about his daily life with the knowledge that he must work with the one he loves, but cannot express that love in front of his co-workers? Slash-Fic. Don't like it, don't read...
1. Chapter 1

_Slam!_

James Lucas paused for a moment after entering the flat.

He listened to the sound of his mother shuffling in her room, half-awake. He waited for the time it took for her to settle down, as he didn't fancy being interrogated about his date and having to make up another lie. He always had to lie to everyone – his mother, his co-workers, himself. Finally the sound died completely, except for the whine of the old fridge, and he continued on to his room.

He stepped into his bedroom and turned on the light. The same old sight of an unmade bed, clothing scattered about the floor, records strewn about, with the record player perched precariously on a rickety old wooden desk. He slung his coat over the chair and stripped down to his underwear and socks, and threw himself down on the bed with its worn pillow and dirty green blanket.

Mr. Lucas reached under the bed and pulled out a bottle of cheap gin with a glass. He picked up the glass and smirked at it for a moment, then carefully set it back on the floor. Tonight, he had no need of a glass; it would only slow the process. He unscrewed the cap with a hand still trembling from anger. He lifted it to his lips and threw back his head. The bottle was only half full now, but it would be empty by the time he let himself drift off. He had rage that needed to be soothed.

Damn Jeanette! Damn her straight to hell! Why did she have to be like this? Why couldn't she just accept that he couldn't get it up and move on like the rest of them? Why did she have to decide that he had a normal problem and that she was going to help him through it?

For the longest time his social life revolved around him finding some girl and taking her out on a few nice dates. They'd both have a good time together until about the third or fourth date – when the push for intimacy refused to be ignored. Then… then… going back to her place and being humiliated, while she tries to grimace in the politest way possible. After a very awkward cup of coffee, he'd go, leaving it up to her whether or not she wanted to see him again… which naturally she never did.

The system worked perfectly until Jeanette, who had unfortunately fallen in love with him.

Mr. Lucas paused in his rumination. He could hear his mother moving around, so he dimmed his lights hoping she wouldn't check on him and, finding him still awake, try to talk to him. He waited until she was back in her room before letting his thoughts catch up with him. He began thinking about all the lies he was telling now. He didn't think he could keep up with them all now…

He lied to his co-workers and his mother about his dates. He lied to his mother and his dates about his job and his co-workers. He lied to his dates about his co-workers and his mother. And himself, of course, he lied to everyone about himself. But Jeanette had genuinely seemed to like him for him, if she knew the real him that is. She didn't know him really, she only knew him from the person that she had built up in her head and he didn't know how to break it to her how wrong she was.

Mind you, if she was going to try to help him overcome his sexual inadequacies, she was welcome to try. As well as get her heart broken in the process. After all, he'd been trying to fix himself for years, and he'd never had any luck. He frowned to himself. "Fix himself" – was that really the term he meant to use? Was that really how he saw himself?

He wasn't sure which thoughts were his own and which were from the gin by this point.

All too soon the bottle was empty. Mr. Lucas looked at the clock. It was almost three and he knew he'd be in a right state in the morning. Captain Peacock would have his ass. Oh well, who cares? He hated the lot of them anyway! A pang of guilt coursed in amongst the gin traversing his veins. That wasn't true and he knew it, but the black hole of self pity was opening up and getting ready to swallow him.

On that note, he decided it was time for bed. He lay back staring up at the ceiling, willing his mind to clear so he could get some sleep. His last thought before the cheap gin finalized its magic was _I wonder what color Mrs. Slocombe's hair will be tomorrow…_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

"After Hours"

Lucas had a terrible morning. He woke up with every inch of the hangover that he thought he'd have and then some. He was so lethargic it took him nearly twice as long as normal to get ready for the day. Because of that he missed his bus, and had to walk to work. By the time he'd reached Grace Brothers entrance he was ten minutes late. As he began the lift ride up to the third floor, he said a little prayer that the day wouldn't be as terrible as he was anticipating, but he wasn't holding out much hope for this being true.

* * *

Captain Peacock was in a right furious state.

He had a backache from sleeping in the spare bed yet again after the 1,764,567th fight he'd had with his wife since their marriage began. She was still angry with him and had refused to make him breakfast, so he had to make due with a bacon butty from Beppos. Then when he got here it was announced that six shipments for both the men and ladies departments had to be put away before the store opening, and because Mr. Lucas was late as usual Peacock had to help out in Menswear.

He looked up from the tie drawer which he was sorting. Mr. Grainger was putting away trousers and Mr. Humphries was hanging up jackets. He looked over at the Ladies counter, where Mrs. Slocombe and Miss Brahms were busy putting things away with Mr. Harman assisting them in their efforts.

If Mr. Lucas had been on time for once, he could be over there assisting the ladies… and how interesting that would be… especially as Miss Brahms was bending over to put away the knickers.

Just then the lift doors opened and Mr. Lucas ran out onto the floor. With unveiled anger, Captain Peacock strode over to him.

"Mr. Lucas! Where have you been?!"

Lucas shuddered, he knew he had to think fast and he had to be original.

"I'm sorry I'm late Captain Peacock," Lucas let his gaze roam wildly over the floor for a moment. His eyes falling upon Mrs. Slocombe (her hair was both pink and purple today), he cobbled together a quick story.

"But you see, as I was crossing the park I saw this woman being assaulted in the hedges. She was a matronly lass with brightly colored hair and I swear to you sir, I thought it was our Mrs. Slocombe. 'Don't move!' I shouted, 'I'll be right there to save you, Mrs. Slocombe!' So I rushed over to help, but when I got there I saw that it was a re-enactment of a Sufi battle and it was really a soldier being tackled. They took me as one of them. To escape, I had to nick a scarf from one of them and sashay off into the crowd.

By the time I got myself extracted from the skirmish, I was very nearly late. Then when I got here, I met Mr. Grace on the ground floor, who, upon seeing the scarf still around my head decided to interrogate me about how business was doing back home. I tried to explain that I am Mr. Lucas and that I had to get upstairs, but I couldn't make him understand. I've only just got away."

Captain Peacock looked highly doubtful about this story, but at least his anger seemed to be fading. He didn't say anything to Lucas, he just made an imperious sweep of his hand toward the men's counter. Lucas bobbed his head and smiled at the dismissal and headed over to the Men's counter where Mr. Humphries waited. Mr. Humphries, dapper as ever, had finished hanging the jackets and was re-stocking the handkerchief drawer. He smiled at Mr. Lucas as he approached.

"You've managed to skirt trouble again, I see. You're just lucky that Peacock is in too much pain to deal with anything properly today or else you'd find yourself right in front of Rumbold."

"You mean it?"

"Of course, he was ever so angry this morning about having to help out behind the Men's counter with the re-stocking."

Lucas shook his head. "So that was why he barked at me even more than usual?"

"You know what he's like. He thinks he's too good to be assisting. Oh, here he comes now. Here," Mr. Humphries passed him the tie drawer. "You re-stock the ties. I'll help you when I finish this."

Mr. Lucas smiled at Mr. Humphries. Mr. Humphries was one of the few people in the store he knew would always treat him kindly. Mr. Humphries treated everyone kindly, but he knew that Mr. Humphries genuinely liked him. So, with the shadow of an upset Peacock hanging over him, Lucas set to work sorting the ties and putting them away.

He was able to work well for about an hour, then the room began to tilt and his head began to pound. He let out a deep sigh and pressed his hand to his forehead.

"What's wrong?" Mr. Humphries asked from next to him.

"I can feel the blood rushing to my head. I've got a terrible hangover and it's only half past ten. I don't think I'll make the day."

"Well, I think I can help. Do you see Captain Peacock or Mr. Grainger around?"

Mr. Lucas looked all around, but he couldn't see either of them around. "All clear"

Mr. Humphries reached up and began to massage Mr. Lucas's temples in a slow, circular motion. It felt wonderfully soothing and calming as the pain began to disappear.

"That's wonderful, Mr. Humphries."

Mr. Humphries giggled and then frowned. Mr. Lucas was still looking peaky and drawn. He needed a pick-me-up, and Mr. Humphries could get it for him.

"You look subdued still. I know just the thing for you. Keep a watch out for me."

Mr. Humphries patted Lucas's hand and slowly slunk over to the Ladies counter to where Mrs. Slocombe stood folding handkerchiefs. She looked rather glum as he approached, but brightened when she saw him.

"Why Mr. Humphries, what brings you to our neck of the woods? I would have thought that you had quite enough to be getting on with to come and visit us."

"Well, our stock was mainly jackets and trousers, so we got mostly everything put away early on. Now we have just ties, socks, and handkerchiefs to put away. With our Mr. Lucas with us at last the job is going much more smoothly. Actually, Mrs. Slocombe, I wanted a word with you."

"You see, I'm feeling a bit knackered, and I wondered if you had anything tucked away to perk me up a bit?" He said, giving his most winning smile.

Mrs. Slocombe, in turn, gave him a wry smile of her own, "I have just the thing."

She moved over to her drawers, quickly looked around for Captain Peacock, and discreetly pulled out a small vial and handed it to him.

"I have a few more if you need them."

Mr. Humphries took it eagerly. "Thanks, love. You're a life-saver." And he gave her a small kiss on the cheek.

"Mr. Humphries! I trust that you are not lost?" Captain Peacock had seen them and had stealthily come over to investigate.

"Oh no, Captain Peacock, I assure you I am not lost. We ran out of chalk and maintenance has a couple of stops to make before it can be delivered, so, of course, I came over to borrow some."

"And why did you not wait for Mr. Harman to bring it to you?"

"Why, what if a customer had come in before Mr. Harman got back, needing alterations. We wouldn't be able to perform them and the customer might take his business elsewhere."

Peacock was silent at this. It's true that if the store would have lost money the fault would have been his. Also, as the most amiable member of staff, Mr. Humphries would have been able to gloss over any bad feelings and short tempers because of the load that had been dropped on them all. Yes, best to just leave this be for now.

"Very well, Mr. Humphries. But don't dawdle gossiping."

Humphries left the counter and hurried back to where Mr. Lucas was waiting, but not before grabbing a glass of water first. He handed both the vial and the glass to Lucas.

"Here. It's brandy. Take alternating sips, but do it slowly. And remember, Mrs. Slocombe has plenty more if you need it."

Lucas did as he was told and found that he instantly felt better drinking the way Mr. Humphries had told him. When he was finished, Humphries took the glass back.

"There now, feeling better?"

"Boy, I'll say. Where did you learn that particular remedy?"

Mr. Humphries gave him an enigmatic smile. "There was a time in my life when I needed cures like that to get through the day."

"Oh yeah, when was this then?"

"Last Thursday."

Lucas laughed heartily, there always was a lot more to Mr. Humphries than met the eye. Lucas didn't think it would be possible to learn everything about him if you knew him for a hundred years. But he always thought it might be fun to try.

The day moved forward slowly, and awfully. Lucas had a customer who came in and tried on four complete suits, but only bought two handkerchiefs and a pair of Y-fronts. After that mess it was time for lunch. He ordered his favorite comfort food – chicken and leek pie. But it was about as far from comforting as it was possible to get. The afternoon only brought him a sale of two shirts and three pairs of gloves, while his compatriots got much more satisfying hauls. But that was to be expected when Mr. Grainger and Mr. Humphries got first chance to serve.

At long last, the day was finished. Lucas was covering up the counters, ready to be done with this day. Across the way, Miss Brahms was talking to Mrs. Slocombe about a date she had that night and she sounded excited. Lucas was glad for her. That didn't mean that he was giving up on her, but it was nice to hear her so happy for a change. Mr. Humphries approached him as he was straightening the covers, lest Mr. Grainger have his ass for it.

"Still feeling alright?"

"Yeah," Lucas said with a smile. "I feel good."

"Well, listen I know you haven't had the best day, so I was wondering if you'd like to come out for a drink with me?"

Lucas felt the sky clear. That was the best offer he'd had all day. He was about to say yes when the phone rang.

"Menswear?" Mr. Humphries always lowered his voice several octaves for the greeting. "Oh hello, yes he's here. Hang on." Mr. Humphries held the phone out to Lucas. "It's for you, it's Jeanette."

Lucas repressed a sigh and took the phone. He listened to Jeanette for a few seconds and, against his better judgment, agreed to meet her at a small café in a half-hour. He sighed as he hung up the phone. He gave a sorrowful look to Mr. Humphries.

"I guess I'll have to take a rain check on that drink."

"Of course," Humphries said, with no trace of bad feeling. "I'll be waiting tomorrow to hear all about your date tonight."

The closing bell rang and they all headed up to the lift and climbed in, with Lucas bringing up the rear. Outside of the doors they all separated, shouting goodbyes to each other. Lucas climbed onto the bus that would take him to the café to meet Jeanette instead of the one that would take him to the pub with Mr. Humphries. He thought, as he sat down, that he would much rather have been on the way to the pub with Mr. Humphries.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to all who have read my story so far. I hope you continue to enjoy "After Hours".** **Thanks to those who reviewed, it is much appreciated.**

* * *

Carrie's Café was a small, quaint little shop tucked in the middle of a moderately busy street. Specializing mainly in teas and coffee, she also offered simple foods in a cozy- lit atmosphere. It was quiet this evening. Hardly anyone was there, which made it nice for having a quiet, intimate chat. Lucas assumed that was why Jeanette had chosen it.

Gazing around at the small tables covered with red tablecloths (red tablecloths were in at the moment) and cozy booths, all with candles on the table, he felt glum. He traced the rim of his coffee cup waiting, just waiting for Jeanette to speak.

Jeanette, who sat sedately sipping her tea, was the opposite of Lucas right now. She was tall and thin, with pale skin, long crimson hair, and emerald green eyes, and wearing a long purple dress with a matching headband. She smiled at Lucas with a light in her eyes that could only be described as puppy love.

"Are you hungry, James?"

"Hmm?" She had pulled Lucas from his reverie and now he was uncertain. "What did you say?"

"I asked if you were hungry."

"Oh, oh yeah," he picked up the small menu in front of him, glad to have a distraction. "Let's order something."

They sat for awhile, studying the offerings. Lucas decided to give the chicken and leek pie a try, it couldn't possibly be worse than at Grace Brothers, while Jeanette chose the seafood salad. The waiter came and took their orders. After he left came the hard part – the conversation. Lucas was sure he knew what conversation it would be. Jeanette gave him a kind, friendly smile (the one he was sure she was perfecting for her practice) and began her questioning.

"So, how was work? I assume it must have been very tiring because you haven't said much since I arrived."

There was Jeanette, always had to explain every little thing. Nobody ever just felt anything or said anything just because. Christ, she may have been training to be a psychiatrist, but was it really necessary for her to analyze everything that was ever said or done?

"It was… frustrating. Had several customers come in who I thought were going to be really good sales, but bought bugger all. And I woke up late so I wasn't on time and got harassed because of that. So that was my day, how was yours?"

She gave him a disapproving look when he said he was late, but didn't say anything. "My day was alright. I turned in my project for abnormal psychology today, so I'll have lots more free time now. I also spoke with one of my counselors today and found out that I qualify for the medical school of my choice."

Lucas smiled at her. "Good, good. I'm happy for you." And he was.

Jeanette's smile widened. "Thank you so much. I know the last few weeks have been hard on our time together, but it will get better." She looked down as if she were marshalling her thoughts in preparation to say something difficult. "I was wondering if you've given any thought about… last night?" Yep, she had brought it up.

"Yes, I have."

She looked up at him. "And?"

He sighed. "And you said that you wanted to try to help me so, what did you have in mind?"

A look spread over her face that was pure happiness mixed with determination. Oh joy! He had become her new project. It had begun.

"Great. I'm glad that you've chosen not to run anymore." Spoken like a true psychiatrist. "But James," she said, taking his hand. "This is a process that could possibly be painful for you, but I promise you the end result will be extremely rewarding. What I need from you is a promise that you will trust me and see this through to the end."

He wanted to laugh at her. He truly wanted to laugh in her face right now, completely denouncing all her faith in him right in front of her. But he didn't, he couldn't. His mother may have failed him in many ways, but she had raised him to be a gentleman. Well, somewhat at least. Other than breaking it off with her right now, the only other thing to do was to let her try – and fail. Truthfully he really didn't want to break it off with her, she was nice and he did like her.

"Alright," he said, shaking her hand. "Let's do it."

* * *

Jeanette had wanted to get started that very night, but Lucas begged off. It had been a hard day and he was tired, too tired even to replenish the gin supply. Still, that hadn't stopped her from bombarding him with suggestions and theories during supper. He had barely tasted his pie in his haste to eat and leave the place. When he got home his mother was in usual form. Demanding to know how his date went (she never even asked about work), then stopping him to question or to nag.

By the time he got to his bed he fell into it face first without getting undressed. He rolled over and set his alarm for a little earlier so he could have a bath in the morning. Then he closed his eyes, opening them only when it occurred to him that he was still wearing his shoes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks to all who have read and reviewed. The reviews were much, much, much appreciated.**

* * *

It had been four days since Lucas had agreed to let Jeanette help him with his problem. So far it had been four days of upset, of questions, of discovery – well, not discovery, actually, as he hadn't learned anything about himself that he hadn't already known.

He was born late in life to parents who didn't want him. His father died when he was young and his mother hadn't any idea how to deal with him. She either sent him away to stay with other relatives for periods or kept him at home, treating him more like a roommate than a son. His schooling career was average, but he was not interested in continuing his education after high school, so he went straight out to work. He'd had normal shop jobs until he started at Grace Brothers.

All in all, he'd had an average life. He enjoyed going out dancing or to the pub, and Sunday games of football or cricket. He read – he wasn't dead common – he especially enjoyed mysteries or westerns. He liked going out to the pictures, though he wasn't that fond of television. He had always thought of himself as a people person and enjoyed making others laugh. He knew he could be obnoxious, but he was charming at the same time.

But Jeanette was certain there was something that he didn't realize about himself or something buried deep that was causing his problems. She kept asking these deep, probing questions and analyzing every answer she got. It hadn't even been a whole week and Lucas was getting sick of this. At first he went along with it, perhaps there was some deep seated issue that was causing him grief, but then all her questions just became annoying. She had him getting up early to go jogging and changing his diet drastically and, although he felt healthier, he hadn't seen much of a difference otherwise.

Now she was saying that she had another idea that she was certain would help, and that they would be executing it on Saturday night. He didn't know whether he should be happy or sad about this, or if he should care at all.

* * *

"I'm really glad we decided to stop off for a drink tonight. After the day we had we both deserve a good stiff drink."

Mr. Humphries smiled. "Or several," he said with his usual air of mischief.

Mr. Humphries and Mr. Lucas had stopped at their usual pub for an after-work drink on Friday night. The departments had spent most of the afternoon listening to a lecture on salesmanship and customer relations given by young Mr. Grace, only to find out that he had the wrong floor and really wanted bathroom fittings. Before that there hadn't been much going on as Austin Reed was having a huge sale that week, and quite a few of their normal customers were there. So one of the times that Mr. Grace had nodded off, Lucas asked Mr. Humphries if he'd want to get a drink after work and Mr. Humphries readily agreed. Now they were sitting in the Wolf & Whistle and Mr. Humphries was having a gin & it, while Lucas had a Churchill – a double, of course.

"I'm just glad we're done for the day. I don't know how much more I could take. What with Jeanette and work and all, it's been hard to find a spare minute to get me head together."

"Mmm, I know what you mean. I've had a full schedule this week too. I've been helping a friend with his catering business. He's had three of his chefs quit and he has a huge wedding this weekend, so I stepped in to help with the cooking. And the things they ordered – oysters Rockefeller, caviar puffs, a full dessert buffet… I'm absolutely bushed!" Mr. Humphries took a sip of his drink and said, "That reminds me, you never told me how things are going with Jeanette?"

Lucas grimaced slightly at the question. "Oh fine, we're fine."

Mr. Humphries smiled and nodded. Lucas thought for a moment, maybe he could talk to Mr. Humphries about his problem. He knew he could confide in Mr. Humphries. Lucas knew he could keep his mouth shut. But something of this nature, best friend or not, he didn't know if he could bring himself to say those words.

"Uh… Mr. Humphries?"

"Yes, Mr. Lucas?"

"I was wondering have you ever… uh, well, you see… have you ever agreed to do something that, even though it was for your benefit, because of a problem you had, um, you see... But it made you rather uncomfortable... Would you continue on with these suggestions or would you cast them off and suffer in silence?"

Mr. Humphries gave him a confused look and blinked a few times. "Would you mind running that by me again?"

Lucas sighed. He had to be more direct. "Mr. Humphries, have you ever had any trouble with any of your… friends?"

"Trouble?"

"Yes, on your end I mean." Lucas gave him a meaningful look.

"You mean," He looked down at his lap and then back up. "Down there?"

"Mmm-hmm." Lucas gave a pained smile.

"As in you can't," He raised his hand up off the bar. "Is that it?"

Lucas nodded. He felt his ears burning. He didn't think he could speak. He just wanted to crawl into a hole and never emerge until everyone he knew was long dead.

"Oooh," Mr. Humphries gave him an understanding smile. He patted Lucas's hand. "Mr. Lucas, believe me when I say that any man who says that he has never and will never have that problem is a liar. It happens to the best of us as well as the worst. So, you are not alone, my friend."

"Even you?" Lucas asked in a small voice.

"As I said, every man," He gave Lucas a look and took another sip of his drink.

Lucas felt like a weight had lifted. Apparently this had been bothering him deeper than he thought. Another thought struck him, maybe Mr. Humphries knew of a remedy that he could recommend.

"Tell me Mr. Humphries, how did you solve your problem?"

"Well, I once had an interest in someone who had no interest in me. It was someone I cared for deeply. Then when this person made it very clear to me that my feelings were never going to be returned, it crushed me, and I began having issues. It wasn't until I read a book on the subject, that I realized that my problem was a reaction to having my heart broken. It was a psychological way of protecting myself even though it was causing me more pain. When I accepted that I was not meant to have the relationship I wanted, but that there were others who I could love just as much who would love me back, the problem went away."

Lucas listened to Mr. Humphries story, it sounded quite like what Jeanette was suggesting. He had thought it was fluff, but maybe there was some real wisdom to it. He resolved to go with her ideas whole-heartedly from now on. He drained the rest of his glass in one gulp.

"Want another?"

"No, I really must be going. My friend is giving a last going over on the order for the wedding tomorrow and I should be around in case we need more of something. Are you coming?"

Lucas shook his head. "No, I think I'll have one more before I go home."

"Well, good night then." Mr. Humphries got up to leave.

"Mr. Humphries?"

He turned back around. "Yes, Mr. Lucas?"

"I just want to say thank you for everything. And I don't just mean tonight, I also mean at the store and looking after me like you do, like you always have since I started. No one else really ever has taken care of me like you have, and I really appreciate it. I just wanted you to know that I really do consider you my true friend."

Mr. Humphries smiled. "I truly do mean it when I call you my friend too, Mr. Lucas. Thank you. Would you like me to stay with you for one more?"

"I couldn't ask you to do that."

"Oh, we made so many caviar puffs the guests can hatch and raise them if they can't get enough else. Troy," He held up a hand to flag the barman down to them. "Two more down here."

The barman walked down to them as Mr. Humphries sat back down on the stool.

"What will it be, gents?"

"I'll have another gin & it and my friend will have…"

"I'll have another Churchill."

The barman fixed the drinks and Mr. Humphries, and Mr. Lucas went back to laughing, and gossiping, and the world outside of the pub ceased to exist.

...


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you to all who have read this story, I hope you continue to enjoy! Thanks also to all the reviewers for their kind reviews!**

* * *

It was Saturday night and Lucas was getting ready for his date with Jeanette. He had taken extra care with his toiletries and had dressed especially for the night. He cast a sidelong glance at his bed and the bottle that was under it. He wondered if he should have a drop to steady his nerves, but sighed instead. Jeanette had asked that he drink no alcohol this evening, she wanted him sober for this. Unwillingly, he tore his eyes away from the bed and finished tying his tie. He took a deep breath remembering what Mr. Humphries had told him, and then set off to meet Jeanette.

Jeanette was waiting for him outside of Angelo's. She looked nice that evening in a white blouse and beige skirt, with a long gold chain and an emerald pendant dangling at the end of it, along with matching earrings. She had piled her hair on top of her head, fastened with a large gold clip.

Everything about her exuded opportunity and success, whereas everything about Lucas screamed closed doors and failure. At least, that's how it seemed to him. He suspected that's what his problem was with her; he never could tell what it was that attracted her to him. Surely there were several university boys that she could go around with. She'd certainly be more comfortable with them than with him.

"Stop moaning," he told himself. "Jeanette's been very good to you. The least you can do is plant a smile on your face and be cheerful. Just because you're miserable doesn't mean you have to bring her down as well."

That was right. He gave a hearty chuckle and kissed her cheek in greeting.

"You look lovely tonight, darling. Shall we go in?"

They went inside and began their evening with both, unbeknownst to the other, crossing their fingers in the hopes of a decent evening.

* * *

To Lucas's great surprise the evening had been great. The food at Angelo's had been superb and he and Jeanette had spent the entire meal laughing. Jeanette had told him a story about an incident from earlier in the day.

She had been with one of her study groups at the university library and one of her friends, a young man studying the Freudian Method of Analysis, held a die-hard conviction in the theory of dream interpretation. To convince his friends of its merits he decided to conduct a little survey by questioning random people around the library about their dreams and giving an analysis. He stopped this one middle-aged woman and asked her to describe her dreams to him. After she had finished, he gave her a very arrogant and derisive summary about herself; concluding that she was far too overtly sexual and, quite possibly, a borderline nymphomaniac. The woman turned beet-red and pulled off her coat and hood to reveal a nun's wimple and habit. She pulled out a long ruler and proceeded to chase him about the library, hitting him over the head with the ruler, and screaming as she ran.

Lucas replied with a story of his own from work. An elderly man had come in to buy a long overcoat and Lucas had shown him several. He chose one and asked to use the fitting room to try it on. Most customers just asked for you to hang up their coat while they tried a new one on, but some have odd predilections, so Lucas showed him to a fitting room and thought no more about it. The man came out and walked right past Lucas to the Ladies counter where Mrs. Slocombe and Miss Brahms were selling matching sets to a group of women. The man opened the coat and the women screamed or gasped, while Mrs. Slocombe had a look on her face that suggested that she'd swallowed a live worm.

The man had then walked back to Lucas, past a red and sputtering Captain Peacock, and said: "I'll take it."

Both of them had laughed at these exploits until they were red in the face and could barely breathe. The laughter had done well to break the tension in the air when they had first sat down. Then, after a lovely meal, they went dancing at their favorite club. Finally at about eleven o'clock they got on the bus and headed back to Jeanette's place. They'd had a tremendous amount of fun, so much so, that Lucas forgot to worry about what was in store.

Jeanette opened the door and turned on the lights, Lucas followed her inside, his good mood deflating as soon as he stepped over the threshold. She walked into the kitchen, calling over her shoulder.

"Sit down. I'm just going to get us some refreshments."

Lucas sat down and looked around the place. Posh it was. You could easily tell by looking around Jeanette's apartment that she had come from money. All the furniture was plush and expensive, antique tables and chairs, oriental rugs, hand-carved and painted figurines from India carved by Brahmin artisans (Jeanette's father was a professor of Indian culture at Oxbridge) and silk curtains. Lucas thought about how out of place he must look among all these fine furnishings. Jeanette came back into the room carrying a silver tray with two silver goblets on it.

"I thought you said we weren't drinking tonight?"

"This is a special fruit juice infused with herbs. A family friend taught me how to make it – it's a Hindu specialty. It refreshes the body and cools it while clearing the mind and senses. It's nice to just sit and relax with it."

"If you say so," Lucas said, raising his glass to her.

They said nothing for awhile, but just sat and sipped their drinks. Lucas had to admit, the juice was doing everything she said it would. He felt quite nice. This really was turning out to be one of the best nights he'd had in a long time. Maybe that was all he needed to do, just calm down and relax.

Lucas and Jeanette had resumed casual chatting on the couch, nothing too deep. Then after both goblets were drained, Jeanette put them back on the tray.

"I have something here that I want to show you."

She pulled open a drawer in the coffee table and pulled out a large black leather book and handed it to Lucas. He took it, looked at the cover, and nearly dropped the book. For a moment he thought his hands were burning…

"The _Kama Sutra_! You want me to read the _Kama Sutra_! Here and now!"

"Yes, you've heard of it?"

"Heard of it! I think you'd be hard pressed to find someone who hasn't heard of it."

"Well, James it's not just a sex manual, it also gives practical advice on human sexual behavior, including love and gaining a spouse. It also gives advice on how to live a gracious and virtuous life."

"So is there any advice in there on how to deal with _me_?" Lucas asked, folding his arms across his chest.

"Well, yes," she opened the book and began flipping through the pages. "The advice given was to try something new to spice up the experience. So here," She handed him the open book. "Find something that looks fun and we'll try it."

Lucas took the book and began flipping through it. As he flipped, he saw a reason for men to take gymnastics lessons. Several positions were interesting to him, but he didn't think he could get into those positions without a doctor's assistance in getting out. Then he came upon a position that he knew he could do that looked quite nice. He handed the book back to Jeanette with the page open. She looked at it and then back up at him.

"Ahhh… Congress of the Cow… _from behind_."

Lucas nodded, an impish grin on his face.

Jeanette stood up. "The bedroom's this way." She said, taking his hand and leading him down the hall.

* * *

Lucas collapsed in a sweaty heap, a huge grin plastered on his face. It had been amazing. No more sexual dysfunction for James Richard Lucas. He turned to Jeanette lying next to him.

"How was it for you? I hope it felt just as good for you as it was for me." He said taking her hand and kissing her.

Jeanette said nothing. She wasn't smiling, rather she had a look on her face of disconcerted revelation.

"James…" she said softly. "Are you aware what just happened?"

Lucas was confused. "Oh yeah, I was there baby!"

"You were trying to stroke me, as if I were a man with a man's parts. You kept reaching around as if to stroke… _it_."

"I was trying… that is… I wanted to reach your…"

"No… no reaching anything of _mine_, James. You were trying to reach for something I altogether _do not have_…"

Lucas leaned away from her. He couldn't speak. All that had occurred was coming back to him.

"There is something else. You spoke to me and called me by a name." Jeanette looked into his eyes, hers filling with tears.

"James, you called me **_Clayborne_**…"


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks again to all my readers and to reviewers! I hope you continue to enjoy my little story!**

* * *

How had he not realized it before? He, James Lucas, was attracted to Wilberforce Clayborne Humphries!

It was _absurd_! And yet…

And yet, Lucas thought as he furtively watched Mr. Humphries from the end of the counter, it was entirely, completely true. It would be easy to blame Jeanette and her drink, but deep down he knew it wasn't true. He wasn't sure when his feelings for Mr. Humphries began or when he realized them, but he'd never acknowledged them to himself. And come to think of it, he didn't know why he wasn't denying them now.

Maybe it was because what he told Mr. Humphries in the pub was true. He took care of Lucas like no one else ever had.

Lucas watched Mr. Humphries helping a customer find a decent raincoat. He began to wonder if his feelings were just a phase he was going through due to his problems and his reliance on Mr. Humphries for help and advice, both at work and after hours. He had to think of a way to test it to be sure.

Just then, a loud crashing sound rang through the departments. A customer knocked over a display in the Ladies Department and Mrs. Slocombe, Miss Brahms, and Captain Peacock scurried over to pick up the stand and collect the garments that were all over the floor. That gave Lucas an idea.

He picked up the handkerchief drawer and looked behind him. Mr. Grainger was coming through with his arms full of trousers that he was taking to a customer in the fitting room.

"Here sir, I _whoa_-"

Lucas and Grainger collided with the trousers landing in a heap and the handkerchiefs landing all over the floor. Lucas sputtered apologies while Mr. Grainger turned red and began bellowing at Lucas.

"Mr. Lucas! You clumsy ox! Now get these handkerchiefs picked up before I get back or I'm going straight to Mr. Rumbold about you!"

Mr. Humphries looked at the scene that played out before him with an uncharacteristic look of anger on his face. Mr. Grainger had gone too far. Bad day or not, it was not right to rebuke anyone like that in the middle of the department. It was only a simple mistake after all, anyone could have made it. He put his sales book down on the counter and, as Grainger stormed away, hurried over and knelt down. He began helping Lucas gather the handkerchiefs, fold them up, and put them away.

"Here, let me help you. That was cruel of him to reprimand you in that nasty manner."

Lucas gave Mr. Humphries a sad smile. "Oh, it's alright. I am a bit clumsy most of the time."

"_Nonsense_! You can be quite graceful," Humphries gave him one of his trademark wry smiles. "I've seen you."

Lucas didn't say anything to that. He was too busy keeping his wits about him. Since he'd admitted his feelings, he was having a hard time keeping them under control. He took a breath and told himself to just pretend that Mr. Humphries was a bird whose eye he was trying to catch. He inched himself closer to Humphries as they picked up the handkerchiefs. The smell of Mr. Humphries' aftershave was making Lucas dizzy. Slowly he let his hand drift over and "accidently" brush Humphries' hand. As their skin touched, Lucas started to shake, and he couldn't force himself to stop. They finished getting the drawer in order and stood up, with Humphries holding the drawer.

"There, Mr. Lucas, the drawer is back together and no harm done." Humphries handed him the drawer, then turned to his sales book.

"Mr. Humphries, are you free?" Captain Peacock called from the center of the floor.

"I'm sorry Captain Peacock but I have to finish writing up this sale..."

"This customer wishes to be measured for some trousers. I know that you will be happy to assist him."

"_I'm free_!"

And Mr. Humphries walked away leaving Lucas to ponder. He knew the second he touched Mr. Humphries that it was all over. If he'd still been in denial over what he was feeling, he wasn't now.

He thought back to the other day when Humphries had massaged his temples – it wasn't the massage itself, it had been the fact that it was Mr. Humphries that had been touching him that had soothed him. The massage felt nice, but it was more the feeling of his hands that satisfied some need. Even just being around Mr. Humphries made Lucas so much happier…

Lucas had finally realized his emotions and embraced them.

But now, _what_ was he going to do about it?

He couldn't very well walk up to Mr. Humphries, grab his bum, and snog him behind the counter! Well he _could_, but he was fairly certain that it would mean that both Humphries and Lucas would be at the front of the unemployment line within the hour. No, he had to go about this the way he would if Mr. Humphries were a bird. And what that meant was finding out what Mr. Humphries was doing tonight. So, he walked over to the counter and stood behind Mr. Humphries as he was finishing up with his customer at the register.

"There you are sir. And don't worry; the trousers will ride up with wear."

The customer left and Mr. Humphries turned around right into Lucas.

"Oh, Mr. Lucas. What are you getting up to at the moment?"

"Nothing really, Mr. Humphries, just waiting to close up."

Humphries looked at the clock. "Only a half-hour more. I know what you mean. I'm rather looking forward to the end of the day myself."

Lucas was interested now. "Oh, any plans for tonight?"

"Yes actually. I'm going out to one of my clubs tonight."

"Any place I would have heard of ?" Lucas tried to look nonchalant, but wasn't quite succeeding.

"Maybe. Do you know of the _Quiet Gentleman_?"

"I've heard of it and I think I know where it is. I'll be out with Jeanette tonight, she wants to talk about something." He pulled a bit of a face at this.

Mr. Humphries looked at him with an expression full of sympathy. "Have you two been fighting lately?"

"Yeah, well, sort of ..." Lucas deliberately turned away from Mr. Humphries.

"Oh, how terrible. Listen, if you wanted to meet me somewhere to…"

"No, Mr. Humphries." Lucas waved aside his offer. "No, you've already made plans. Besides tonight could go much better than I'm expecting it to."

"Well, alright, if you're sure." Mr. Humphries didn't look convinced, but he let himself be swept out in a throng of co-workers.

Lucas did not follow immediately, but slunk back to the goods lift and took it down to maintenance. He wanted to have a word with Mr. Harman before he left…


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks again to all readers and reviewers! I hope you continue to enjoy my little story!**

* * *

The Quiet Gentleman was, well, _quiet_. There were only about fifteen or so gentlemen there at the bar or talking at tables. It was wide and open, but quiet and intimate at the same time. The gentlemen within were dressed quite nicely, making certain the place was living up to its name. The lighting was soft, but tasteful at the same time, and smooth jazz music was playing from the jukebox in the corner.

The quiet gentlemen were enjoying the ambiance of the Quiet Gentleman, and not a single lady was to be seen…

Mr. Humphries sat at a small table near the corner, wearing a black pinstripe suit and a pink silk tie with his black homburg at a jaunty angle. He sat sipping a babycham. He never drank anything too hard early on – he'd had bad experiences with getting drunk too early. He looked around as he sipped, he didn't see anyone that he fancied so far, but the night was young. The door opened and Mr. Humphries looked up and his mouth dropped open. It was Mr. Lucas!

Mr. Humphries watched in amazement as Lucas walked up to the bar and ordered a beer. Then he brought his beer over to Mr. Humphries's table.

"Good evening, Mr. Humphries. Mind if I sit down?"

Humphries shook his head, so Lucas sat down opposite him. "Whatever are _you_ doing here, Mr. Lucas?"

Lucas sighed and scratched his head, "Jeanette and I had a disagreement over my level of education and what I'm going to do about it. She wants me to go back to school and I see no need to. So she went home and I just decided to go – anywhere else. I just started walking until I found myself outside this pub. I remembered that you were coming here tonight, so I came in hoping you were still here to talk to. Is it alright if I stay awhile with you?"

Mr. Humphries bit his lip. He had been hoping to find someone to spend the evening with at home. His mother was gone for the night, and it wasn't often that she was gone. But as he looked up into Lucas's desperate face, he knew he couldn't refuse. He never had been able to refuse Mr. Lucas anything.

"Alright," he said with a smile, patting Mr. Lucas on the hand. "You can stay."

They spent the next two hours just chatting and having a few drinks. That is not to say that they were always alone. Occasionally a friend of Mr. Humphries would come over to say a few words, only to be deterred by Lucas. Whenever Mr. Humphries looked away, Lucas would glare and make intimidating motions toward the interloper. When he wanted to, Lucas could be quite intimidating. The intruder would make a quick goodbye and leave. After awhile Mr. Humphries drained the rest of his glass.

"Well, I was thinking of heading home. Would you be interested in stopping by for a nightcap?" He was hoping Mr. Lucas would say yes. The evening had been rather depressing and he didn't want to be alone right now.

Lucas smiled at him. "I'd be happy to." He could see that Mr. Humphries was looking a bit depressed. If Lucas's luck held, he would not be gloomy for long.

The two men settled up their tabs and headed out to catch the bus to the Humphries' residence. Mr. Humphries unlocked the door and let them in. As they walked in he turned on several lamps. The soft lighting was cozy and comforting.

"Here we are. Come on in and make yourself at home. Here, let me take your coat." Mr. Humphries took the coats over to the coat rack. "So… how about that nightcap? What do you fancy?"

"Vodka, if you've got it." That'll do, for now, Lucas thought.

"Coming right up," Humphries bustled off to take fetch the drinks.

Lucas looked around in his absence. The flat was very clean and well cared for. The furnishings and ornamentation were due mostly to a mother's influence, but what made an impression on Lucas were the feelings of love and hominess that pervaded. There were a lot of pictures about, mostly of Mr. Humphries, but there was a woman in some of them, a woman whom Lucas assumed was Mrs. Humphries. Looking at these, he felt a twinge of jealousy; he could count on half of one hand the number of pictures of him there were at his home.

Lucas's eyes were drawn to a photograph on a little table next to an armchair with a yellow and blue afghan on it. The photograph, in an antique silver frame with small green stones in the corners, showed a small boy being cuddled close by a woman in a lacy dress. If Lucas was not mistaken, it was Mr. Humphries at, Lucas estimated, age three or four. He looked like he was wearing a suit with a rose in the button hole. He was very cute, laughing like he was, and his mother was looking at him with a look of pure love in her eyes.

"I'm back," Mr. Humphries had returned with the drinks. "Vodka for you, and a port and lemon for me… Here, have a seat."

Lucas sat down in the chair with the afghan while Mr. Humphries sat on the sofa opposite. Lucas took a sip of his drink and handed the picture to Mr. Humphries.

"That's sweet. When was this taken?"

Mr. Humphries looked at the photo with a happy smile. "This was taken at my mother's wedding. Well it was _supposed_ to be her wedding day, only Uncle Donald never showed up. The funny thing about it was I don't remember her being sad about it. She was laughing and happy, like that was what she really wanted all the time. She always used to say that as long as she had me she didn't need anyone else to love her. She kept me a child as long as she could, and even then long after she couldn't, too. But I suppose you've noticed that." Mr. Humphries looked down at his lap with a faint blush staining his cheeks. Lucas thought the blush was sweet, but he understood all too well what Mr. Humphries was saying.

"Actually my story is much the same. My parents were older when I was born, and while I knew they loved me, I always felt like I was interrupting them by being there. My father died when I was six and my mother never acted like a mother should, I always felt like I was a bother. Then when I was sixteen she broke her leg in a fall, she was always rather frail, and then she changed. She didn't want me away from her unless I had to be and she's never grown out of that. She has a horror every time we work late or if it seems like I'm getting serious with a girl that I'll leave and never come back."

Humphries smiled, he didn't look embarrassed anymore. He raised his glass to Lucas.

"_To overbearing mothers_!"

Lucas clinked glasses with him. It felt good to be able to finally tell someone about his parents. He had never met anyone that he trusted with the information. He had never met a lot of people in his life that he felt that he could truly trust. He'd been burned a number of times before, but something told him that Mr. Humphries would rather take a world cruise as Young Mr. Grace's secretary, than to betray him.

"Ah well, what can you do, eh? Listen, it's getting rather depressing in here. Fancy a game of Scrabble?"

"Certainly! Wait here, I'll get it out." And Mr. Humphries moved one of the tables in between them and disappeared down the hall to fetch the game.

Lucas made sure he was out of sight before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small blue bag filled with scrabble tiles. He and Harman had snuck into the toy department and grabbed one of the sets. Lucas had told Harman the truth about why he wanted it… well, he substituted a woman's name for Mr. Humphries… but everything else he'd said was true. Harman had been eager to help and Lucas knew he'd never tell anyone about stealing the game, as he had too much to hide himself. Lucas checked quick to make sure he had all his tiles ready and arranged on his lap and also that nothing would be visible to Mr. Humphries.

Mr. Humphries came back and set the board up. They tossed a coin to see who went first and Lucas won. He pretended to study his tiles and spelled out "need" on the board.

"Hmm," said Mr. Humphries. "Oh, I know just what to do."

The game continued with a couple more drinks and with Lucas spelling out "love, "lust "desire", "kiss", "want", "sex", and "touch". With each word Mr. Humphries seemed to be losing his cool. He had beads of sweat along his forehead and his breathing was growing heavier. At "sex" his eyes went wide and his lips pursed in an "O." He had taken off his jacket and Lucas could see a slight tremble in his hands.

When Lucas spelled out "lick" on the board, Mr. Humphries clenched his knees together.

"Mr. Lucas," Humphries asked in a hoarse voice. "Now it may be nothing, but are you trying to tell me something?"

"Yes, I am."

"I see," He was looking pale and frightened now. "What exactly is it that you're trying to say?"

"In a word, Mr. Humphries, I fancy you and I would like to do something about it."

Mr. Humphries stared at him for a second, then fainted dead away.

Lucas sighed and shook his head, "Glass of water for Mr. Humphries."

He went over to the couch and laid Mr. Humphries out on it properly, with a comfortable pillow behind his head. He sat down at the other end of the couch with Humphries' feet on his lap. He proceeded to take off the shoes and socks, stroking his feet to keep them warm. It was in that moment, as he watched Humphries sleep that he realized something else about himself.

Lucas wasn't merely attracted to him; he was in love with him.

Lucas was in love with his sensitivity, his charm, his humor, his gentleness, his kindness, his cleverness, and his sweetness. He gently tickled the bottoms of his feet. Humphries twitched slightly in his sleep, and Lucas continued tickling until Humphries began to stir. He gave a soft moan and slowly sat up. Blinking his eyes, he looked at Lucas.

"I'm sorry about that; I don't know what came over me. Oh wait, yes I do." He looked at Lucas with fear and apprehension in his eyes. "Mr. Lucas, what you said before I fainted. Did you mean it?"

In an answer, Lucas leaned over and gently kissed Mr. Humphries full on the mouth. It was a shy gentle kiss, but at the same time, Lucas tried to put everything he could not say into it. All of the things he'd just discovered, but yet knew all along.

And the question – the hope – that his feelings would be returned…

An eternity later, the kiss broke. Both men stared at each other. Lucas was too stunned, too apprehensive to move. Luckily for him Mr. Humphries stood and pulled Lucas up with him.

"Come on, top of the stairs, second door on the right, you can't miss it."

* * *

Two hours later, they lay in Mr. Humphries' bed still entwined. Humphries had his head on Lucas chest and Lucas was stroking his back with soft fingers. Breaking the reverie, Lucas spoke.

"I know it's a bit late for this, but your mother definitely is going to be gone all night?"

"Of course, she's visiting a friend in hospital," Humphries answered, languidly.

"You see, one of her friends is a huge fan of Liz Taylor. She bought a pair of fake eyelashes to get those beautiful full lashes that Liz has. Unfortunately, when she was waiting for the glue to dry, you know how you have to hold the eyes apart when the glue is drying, well, she was waiting for the glue to dry, when she sneezed. She wound up gluing her eyes shut. Mother's gone to stay with her overnight before the operation tomorrow. You see, there's too much wiggling when you try to insert a pry bar when they're awake, one false move and you lose your eye, so she's being put under for it."

Lucas breathed a sigh of relief, he really didn't want to leave now anyway. He went back to stroking his friend's back. Humphries, however, said in a small voice, not looking at him.

"If you wanted to leave, I'd understand, you know."

Lucas put a finger under his chin and gently raised his head. "Do you want me to leave?"

Humphries shook his head. "No, I don't want you to leave."

"Then, I won't." Lucas kissed him on his forehead for good measure. "You know, when I started at Grace Brothers I never would have imagined that one day I'd be laying here in your bed."

"Not to break the romantic mood or anything, but why are you here? I thought you only liked girls? And I thought you really wanted this relationship with Jeanette?"

"I did. But at some point recently I realized that I have feelings for you, and you know me, Clay, I can't stand to deny myself anything that I want. Then, when you were laying there on the couch, I realized that I don't just want you. I love you."

Mr. Humphries turned and looked him straight in the eyes. "James Richard Lucas, I have been in love with you since the moment I first laid eyes on you. You took my heart when Rumbold brought you down and introduced you as the new junior starting in Menswear. I used to pray so hard that it wouldn't be visible because I was afraid that you would get uncomfortable and leave your position."

"Wilberforce Clayborne Humphries, even before I understood my own feelings, I would never have been disgusted by yours. I would never have left you then, and I won't leave you now. Trust me, please."

Humphries looked deeply into Lucas' eyes, "I will trust you, always," he said, in a soft loving voice.

With that said Mr. Humphries rolled over and turned out the light. Both men quickly fell asleep to the soft rhythm of each other's heartbeats.

Shortly before six they said their goodbyes.

Lucas went home to bathe, dress, and eat. He managed to get into work with only a minute to spare as usual. He then went over and had his usual morning's gossip and moan with Mr. Humphries. Everything carried on at Grace Brothers the way it always had.

However, unbeknownst to anyone else, something big had changed behind the Men's counter. Mr. Humphries and Mr. Lucas had begun a secret love affair which would result in grave consequences for both if it was discovered. But neither cared about that when they were living their love moment to moment.

And in those moments they were together and that's all that mattered.


End file.
